Following with a little envy and much thankfulness.
Envy because I would love, love, love to go with the Compassion Bloggers. If you have followed even one of their trips, you surely must know why I would like to participate. Flying to another country, seeing Compassion at work up close and first hand, possibly meeting a child that I sponsor, travelling with good people who share a belief in God and in the work done through Compassion, telling everyone about it because I'm supposed to (not just because I can be 'chatty' like that)... win, win, win, win, Win!
It would be amazing.
I remember the first trip I followed (it was to the Philippines) almost as if I went myself. For the entire trip I was a red-eyed, tissue wielding reader to anyone who would listen. I had never heard of Compassion but the bloggers on that trip gave me a heart-gripping lesson on the amazing gift of sponsorship. Not for the children, but for the sponsors. And at the same time, they made it clear how very important sponsorship is to these children. I thought about it for weeks after.
|This little guy stole my heart.|
Photo by Keely Scott taken From:
Compassion International Bloggers Philippines 2011
Beyond envy, I follow them with much thankfulness because there is No Way I could participate in these trips myself so I must rely on them to take a vicarious vacation. I am realistic. I don't meet any of the requirements that make a good pick for this trip. Certainly in the very least, I would need a bigger audience to be effective. And I write this without any bad feelings or problems with that reality. The whole point of these trips is getting the word out about Compassion.
Still, that wouldn't stop me from sending in an email so I could be considered. I'm a little
And there is one other (the real?) reason I do not want to apply for these trips.
If I am honest, sometimes I am not a very nice person.
I don't want to be a mean/petty/selfish/etc person but occasionally I forget I don't want that and I act in that very manner.
I can be rude without meaning to be - open mouth insert foot. Again.
I have a completely awful time with accents. Any kind of accents. It's embarrassing.
I don't think my ears work correctly.
I have a thing about smells. Smells I don't recognize make my nostrils flare.
I know, attractive right?
I guess my point is, I'm scared. It would be such an incredible difference, and I would be mortified and so ashamed if I insulted or hurt someone. What if culture shock struck and I turned into Mr. Hyde?
Can you imagine? Going over to do good and being so blessed for that opportunity and then hurting or insulting someone. uggg
Obviously I would be on my very best behavior and I would like to think that inside I Do have compassion... but the thought of such a trip is overwhelming to me. I can't even begin to imagine what a person's emotions are like on such an adventure. Or how a person deals with it all when it's time to go home.
I would really love to be a participant of one of these trips, but when I get right down to the nitty gritty inside me, I don't really trust myself with such a (someday maybe possible) opportunity.
So I am thankful for each Compassion Blogger. I am thankful for their hearts and their words and their bravery. I am thankful that they take the plunge and share with us about something I cannot or will not do myself. Please join me in taking a virtual trip in November and you will see exactly what I'm going on about.
If you take a minute to follow Prairie Living on facebook and/or twitter, I will be sure to remind you when the trip begins. I'm excited about it already!
Have you followed the Compassion bloggers before? Do you have a favorite trip?