June 6, 2012

The Trip I Never Took

The Compassion Bloggers have their next location picked out. I'm not sure which bloggers are going, besides Shaun Groves and Keely Scott, but I know I will be following the entire trip.

Following with a little envy and much thankfulness.

Envy because I would love, love, love to go with the Compassion Bloggers. If you have followed even one of their trips, you surely must know why I would like to participate. Flying to another country, seeing Compassion at work up close and first hand, possibly meeting a child that I sponsor, travelling with good people who share a belief in God and in the work done through Compassion, telling everyone about it because I'm supposed to (not just because I can be 'chatty' like that)... win, win, win, win, Win!

It would be amazing.

 I remember the first trip I followed (it was to the Philippines) almost as if I went myself. For the entire trip I was a red-eyed, tissue wielding reader to anyone who would listen. I had never heard of Compassion but the bloggers on that trip gave me a heart-gripping lesson on the amazing gift of sponsorship. Not for the children, but for the sponsors. And at the same time, they made it clear how very important sponsorship is to these children. I thought about it for weeks after.

This little guy stole my heart.
Photo by Keely Scott taken From:
 Compassion International Bloggers Philippines 2011 

I also followed the last trip to Tanzania. I learned so much more this trip. This time I wasn't new to Compassion anymore and I read as a sponsor since my family now sponsors a beautiful young girl. While my point of view was different, I still spent that week with teary eyes and prosthetic tissue box. Oh how these writers can handle a pen and shape their words! They grab my heart and squeeze hard and hold on and it hurts. If it wasn't for the amazing hope that also shines through, it would be unbearable. Hope where it seems there should be none. Hope right there in beautiful smiles and joyful songs and giggling fun.

Absolutely Amazing.

Beyond envy, I follow them with much thankfulness because there is No Way I could participate in these trips myself so I must rely on them to take a vicarious vacation. I am realistic. I don't meet any of the requirements that make a good pick for this trip. Certainly in the very least, I would need a bigger audience to be effective. And I write this without any bad feelings or problems with that reality. The whole point of these trips is getting the word out about Compassion.

Still, that wouldn't stop me from sending in an email so I could be considered. I'm a little egomaniacal pushy enthusiastic like that. What does stop me however, is my less than fantastic ability to fly. I love to fly but my body does not seem to agree and it has made the consequences very clear... If I am going to fly, I am going to pay with my health. By the time I could recover, it would be time to go home.

And there is one other (the real?) reason I do not want to apply for these trips.

If I am honest, sometimes I am not a very nice person.
I don't want to be a mean/petty/selfish/etc person but occasionally I forget I don't want that and I act in that very manner.
I can be rude without meaning to be - open mouth insert foot. Again.
I have a completely awful time with accents. Any kind of accents. It's embarrassing.
I don't think my ears work correctly.
I have a thing about smells. Smells I don't recognize make my nostrils flare.
I know, attractive right?

I guess my point is, I'm scared. It would be such an incredible difference, and I would be mortified and so ashamed if I insulted or hurt someone. What if culture shock struck and I turned into Mr. Hyde?

Can you imagine? Going over to do good and being so blessed for that opportunity and then hurting or insulting someone.  uggg

Obviously I would be on my very best behavior and I would like to think that inside I Do have compassion... but the thought of such a trip is overwhelming to me. I can't even begin to imagine what a person's emotions are like on such an adventure. Or how a person deals with it all when it's time to go home.

I would really love to be a participant of one of these trips, but when I get right down to the nitty gritty inside me, I don't really trust myself with such a (someday maybe possible) opportunity.

So I am thankful for each Compassion Blogger. I am thankful for their hearts and their words and their bravery. I am thankful that they take the plunge and share with us about something I cannot or will not do myself. Please join me in taking a virtual trip in November and you will see exactly what I'm going on about.

If you take a minute to follow Prairie Living on facebook and/or twitter, I will be sure to remind you when the trip begins. I'm excited about it already!

Have you followed the Compassion bloggers before? Do you have a favorite trip?


  1. I love this post!!! To go would be incredible for sure. My child is through World Vision. I wonder if they do something like this? Blessings friend.

    1. I'm happy you enjoyed it. I believe World Vision will do child-sponsor visits from the little I've read but I don't sponsor with them so I don't know for sure. I'm sure their office can tell you if it's possible and all the details.
      One of these days I'll get brave and try flying again with doc recommended meds or something. I really would love to visit our sponsored child.
      Thanks for stopping by!

  2. I so relate to this post. I've always wanted to do a foreign missions trip, but felt I'm too big of a wimp to do it well. However, I went last year anyway to El Salvador and fell in love with the people there so much that I'm going back again in a month.

    But still. I get tired and cranky and don't like the food and am inconvenienced and don't sleep well and get irritated with other team workers, etc. I try to push all that aside for a week, and thankfully the Lord graciously accomplished that for me (for the most part) last year. I'm praying he'll work the same way this year because my friends I made last year will be expecting more of me this time (as in, eating more of THEIR food, which scares me to death, ha. I don't want to get sick while I'm there).

    I sponsor a child through World Vision and they do have a similar program as Compassion, but first you have to commit to a year of doing monthly speaking engagements, etc., so I sorta ruled it out. But I would LOVE to go too. I intentionally chose a child from El Salvador to sponsor so that perhaps I could see him when we return this year, but it's not working out that way. Maybe another time.

    Thanks for inspiring me to at least follow other bloggers who can go. Maybe one day we'll make it ourselves. :-)

    1. Wow that's fantastic. I hope you have an amazing time on your trip (and stay healthy!) Eating food I'm not used to would be hard, I think. You are braver than I am, my friend. I will say a prayer for your continued courage.

      If you are in the practice of writing to your sponsored child, take a look at my compassion tab at the top. Towards the bottom of the page are links for all kinds of stuff to mail with letters.
      Thanks for reading and sharing with us.

  3. Penny,
    I've looked at the Compassion trips. We have taken mission trips when the kids were younger and yearn to take another one. It will either be a Compassion trip or research trip for an orphanage in which to invest our time/ money.

    1. Taking your kids on a mission trip. I love that idea and I think it's very brave. I mean, I know, it's not like you would leave them and go off to another country but I think I would be hesitant to take my kids with me somewhere 'unknown'.

      An orphanage would be so worthwhile to invest in. We have been talking as a family at looking at some type of project to work at. We heard about a little girl not far from us who is raising $15,000 to build a school in Haiti and we were so inspired.
      Thanks for stopping by Kerry. I'd love to hear more about your trip when it happens.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...